today
tulips.
soaked in warmth
let their leaves down
peeled their petals open
as they rouged in the sun.
finally naked
beautiful , free ,
dancing with the wind
patiently waiting-
for the bees.
before
two lips.
there was yours
there was mine.
they shared kisses
whispered truths
held onto secrets,
an-other flavour
you needed more.
that’s when mine sealed,
two lips turned to three.
after
to (the) lips.
soft and gentle
guarding a smile
tricked by the
Cheshire cat
they curl, they heal
they felt the heart fall
they trembled when it broke.
they learned, they sang,
now they hum.
They know love.
This post is possible because of the people who helped me navigate heartbreak. I’ve found myself again, and am writing because of so many wonderful people. Via kind words, phone calls, messages, gestures, time, lunches and patience; this compassion did not go unnoticed. There were many days I was afraid to feel how awful the loneliness might be on a day off. Instead, I found myself overwhelmed with the gracious amounts of unconditional love I received.
To everyone, thank you from the very bottom of my heart. Your warmth and tenderness in handling the scattered and broken pieces of my heart while it was strewn across the floor is why I am able to feel it beating stronger today.
When my trust was broken I explained it as: Imagine a porcelain plate. Now imagine dropping it from a 2-storey building. My heart is that plate. Does that make sense? In hindsight, the flaw in this logic is it fails to see a solution in which it comes back together. After some time has passed, and amidst the devastation, I managed to find a solution.
Along my healing process, I came across the Japanese term kintsugi (alt. kintsukuroi): “The Japanese art to ‘repair with gold’; the art of repairing pottery with gold or silver lacquer and understanding that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken.” My heart will never be what it was before, because it has been reassembled with a gold lacquer mixture blended from the unconditional love of my people. The outpouring of kindness has allowed my heart to evolve into an example of the art of kintsugi. Thank-you for everyone’s contribution towards healing, and helping me feel beautiful again.
It feels so good to be back!
Much love xoxo,
Adrea
.